People worry too much about scores - its as much about the experience of trying something new, and the setting you try it in, as it is a whisky. That said, sometimes a score does help put things into perspective. So, we use a simple 1 to 5 rating system for our whisky, and a 1 to 3 rating system for our bars.
1/5 – There is no bad whisky. There are only some whiskies that aren't as good as others. Pick one of the others.
2/5 – Let someone else buy you a measure and you can cook with it, maybe you can even add it to the food.
3/5 – Buy a measure of it. Everybody's got to believe in something. We believe we’ll have another of these.
4/5 – Buy a bottle of it because alcohol can be a man’s worst enemy and the bible says love your enemy.
5/5 – This is best drink in existence, the effect of which is like having your brains smashed out with a slice of lemon wrapped round a large gold brick.
1/3 – The only difference between this place and a prison is the alcohol, it’s better in jail
2/3 –It’s a bit like the beginning of a party before everyone has had enough to drink, but it has potential
3/3 – Worth going out of your way for. First you take a drink, then the drink takes a drink, then the drink takes you
1/3 – You can get drunk here, but drinking just to get drunk is like having sex just to get pregnant
2/3 – Outside the mainstay bottles which, taken in sufficient quantities, may produce all the effects of drunkenness
3/3 – An exceptional selection that will make you feel bad for people who don’t drink. When they wake up in the morning, that’s as good as they’re going to feel all day.
1/3 – Nothing special, the kind of bar where everyone knows your name, as long as your name is ‘Hey’
2/3 – Get your friends to go with you; drunken men give some of the best pep talks
3/3 – This is your new local. Go, even by yourself, it’s a great advantage to not drink among hard drinking people